Infatuation and Love: What Is the Difference?

Before speaking about the difference between infatuation and love, it is important to clarify: love is a complex concept. It has many definitions, and each one depends on the side from which you look at it.

Here I rely on Lilith’s teaching and on the nature of love as energy.

In this logic, love is a state of an open heart, through which the flow from the Source is directed toward where your interest and attention are. More simply: from you to another person. But more precisely: from soul to soul.

This clarification is important. Because outwardly it seems to us that we love a person: their face, voice, behavior, gestures, image. But in depth, love touches not the picture, but the soul.

What infatuation is

Infatuation is the movement of the flow not so much toward the soul of a person, but toward the image you have created inside yourself.

You see appearance, first actions, manner of speaking, separate qualities — and on this basis, the mind and heart quickly assemble an image. Sometimes beautiful. Sometimes strong. Sometimes almost ideal.

And it is precisely toward this image that the heart opens.

Unlike love, which is directed from heart to heart, infatuation often becomes a flow from your heart into the outer world. It may go not so much toward the real person as toward the image you have created. If the image turns out to be mistaken, the flow does not find a deep addressee and disperses into the outer world.

There is nothing bad in this. Infatuation can be bright, inspiring, alive. It gives a flash of happiness, taste, interest, the desire to look, think, and come closer. But its weak point is that it is often directed not toward the real person, not toward their soul, but toward an assumption about them.

That is why infatuation more often arises where there is little knowledge and much space for fantasy. Not necessarily only in youth, but youth truly gives itself to this state more easily: less experience, less caution, more faith in the created image.

Why infatuation passes

Infatuation passes when the image meets reality.

You come to know the person more deeply — their character, reactions, weaknesses, shadow, habits, true motives. And it may turn out that the heart was open not to them, but to someone else: to the one you had drawn inside yourself.

Then the flow gradually stops. Not because you “made a mistake” in a bad sense, but because the heart no longer sees an addressee. An outer picture is not enough for it. It needs depth.

How infatuation can become love

Infatuation can be the first impulse. It opens attention, awakens interest, gives the energy of approach. But after that, it is important to see the real person.

If the soul opens behind the image, if the heart does not close after knowing the truth, if the flow becomes calmer, deeper, and more stable — infatuation can turn into love.

Infatuation often gives euphoria on the outgoing flow: you feel good from the state itself, from the world, from expectation, from the inner uplift.

Love changes the quality of movement. The flow no longer goes into an image, but from heart to heart. There may be no less happiness, but it becomes quieter, deeper, and more stable. Instead of a flash, support appears.

This is exactly where the main boundary lies:

• infatuation loves an image; 
• love recognizes the soul.